Wednesday, April 26th, 2006
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5:58 pm
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so lately, i cant eat. and i dont know why. its pretty much awful. i see food and it makes me want to puke. and its not that i dont wanna eat cuz i think im fat or some shit. but my pants are like falling off my ass. and i feel like a pile of steaming shit.
besides that, im pretty much madly in love with my boyfriend. um yes. hes really amazing and i love him alot. he makes me so happyyy =] ahh yaah tuesday is a year and 11 months. then 2 effin years. BAH so pumped. i wuv himmmmmmmm<333
virginia beach was a good time for the most part. minus getting like 2 hours of sleep the whole time. hah and a 15 hour bus ride and breaking down like 6 times. but spent with amazing people so its all goood. ok i have hw.
current mood:  sleepy
current music: fall out boy
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Sunday, March 26th, 2006
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3:09 pm - i need a new goddamn layout now ='[
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yo.
so basically adam is a colt and i cried. not gonna lie. he sucks so fucking bad. not even gonna be excited for football anymore he like totally ruined it. =[ ...ok so i will be but def not as much. guy is like my life
i went to fall out boy, all american rejects, hawthhorne heights, from first to last, and the hush sound concert and some other band i think with melisssh her aunt, geena, and j. and it was like extremely fun. i looove all american rejects now. i used to like them alot, and then i saw them and heard some songs i used to love and like fell in love with them again.
anyways. ive been driving around..BAHAHA i pretty much suck. and either go too slow or too fast. but hey whatev ill learn eventually. im goin to pick up my brother soon.. should be a good time duude =]
i got up around 8:30 today.. yea 8 fucking 30 and i actually felt good and awake after i showered. maybe i shouldnt sleep my life away so often anymore. lol the day seems soo much longer if you dont sleep till 2.
myyyy boyfriend is really amazing ferrreeeeal dude. i love him so much..guuuh sodoho;fusdoferu sososo much<333333333 =D =D
current mood:  bouncy
current music: all american rejects! <3
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Monday, February 13th, 2006
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11:22 pm
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tomorrows valentimeeees day. =] =]
ive always loved valentines day, even when i didnt have a valentine.
but this is my second valentines with myyy boooy<3 hes great.
school is not.
current mood:  happy
current music: brown derbies-->romeo and juliet
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Thursday, February 2nd, 2006
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7:59 pm
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hey school is fucking ridiculous and it makes me want to fucking drop dead.
i miss my parents. im sick of being home alone at night. its scary and the other night i thought i was going to die. not kidding..i had a mental breakdown.
so anyways today my love came over..and hes been there for me all week ahah cuz it hasnt been easy at all. i just want it to end. my parents are flying back tomorrow but its supposed to pour. so flights may be delayed.awesome =/
buhhhh
saturday im sleeping over shells with j and chelssss IM EXCITED. s;dfisldf woooo
k got like. 4 more hours of homework to do so bye
current mood:  irritated
current music: dashboard-places that you come to fear the most
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Friday, January 27th, 2006
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7:12 pm
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my parents are going on a cruise for a week on sunday. im gonna miss them. =[ but i hope they have a good time.
im finally feeling like better about things. my mom knew i havent been in a great mood lately so she took me to bk and we talked and stuff..i wicked love her<3 then we went to the grocery store and she bought me anything i wanted. hahaha wicked cool friday night =]
so sometimes my boyfriend likes to say EXTREMELY cute things that make me cry..i still get butterflies from him..sdofjsodf makes me soo happy<3<3<3
current mood:  chipper
current music: between the buried and me.
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Monday, January 23rd, 2006
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7:22 pm
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k so i honestly dont know whats wrong with me lately.
i randomly flip out at like any little thintg and ive cried every day for the past like 12 days. i think it was pms at one time but it cant be lasting this fuckin long..but when i get pms all i do is cry. like over everything. it sucks soo fucking bad. ive been crying over every little thing. and its beginning to bother me, and its starting to make curtis think he cant do anything to help. but he really does help. like so much.. ugh and he just left and i need him back here like now. my parents have also been on my ass about everything. which is starting to get SOOO annoying like UGHHHHHHHHHH my mom on my ass about sex. shut the fuck up mom im not having sex. and she knows it but she just keeps going. just because she got fucking pregnant at 16 she thinks im going to do it too. then like i dont clean enough supposively. and im a lazy piece of shit who does nothing. i have like 53058 hours of homework to do every single night. and they get home and im doing it and they just flip out on me for not cleaning. ugh wow. i know theres so much more bad things that could be happening, and normally this wouldnt bother me at all. im the type of person who would just laugh it off..but not lately.. i just feel like ive been in an awful mood like 24/7..and i really kinda have been. curtis and my friends are like the only things keeping me going right now. curtis has really been there for me and im so glad i have him..ugh i love him so much.. i just feel like not me at all. and i kinda hate it more than anything..
current mood:  depressed
current music: nothing
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Monday, January 16th, 2006
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5:33 pm
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i havent eaten a real meal in like 2 fucking weeks. ive been living off crackers and popsicles. i wanna cry every time i fucking swallow. i want to fucking shoot myself. and i miss my boyfriend. and somme people wicked piss me off. awesomeeeee
current mood:  drained
current music: nothing. my fuckin ears ringing and thats it
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Saturday, January 14th, 2006
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4:51 pm - 16 months without you=[
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the fuckin pats are playing the broncos tooooniiiight! and everyones choosing denver to win =/ gaaaaaaaahasd;fisd dude the pats are gonna fucking win. =D
k so curtis came over today and we made bagel pizza and watched chick flicks. =] hahaha i wuvvvvvvvah my boy. then i sang carrie underwood for him which was AWFUL bc i have no voice. i lost it yesterday and i sound so0o0o disgusting. ugh
im happy times 60000 milllion thousand billion that midterms are done. seriously, one more book one more note one more fucking essay and ill seriously drop the fuck dead. ive never studied soo much in my lifeeee
i got my permit yesterday after g block fiinaaal and then i went shoppin woo0o so fun. got my nails done. got some stuff at hollister and then some stuff at filenes. sweet
ummmmmmm im basically a scub. with a messy room. i needa put clothes on and get ready to gooo acush im goin to my aunt&uncles for the GAAAAAAAAAME TAHNIGHT
today is 16 months without jake..and i misss him SOO much.. =[ <3<3
current mood:  dorky
current music: vanna
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Thursday, January 12th, 2006
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9:46 pm - these are the things that matter now, so sing along and be prepared<3
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im sick. i feel like a huge pile of steaming shit. i wanna get bettter and i have no voice to sing a german song in front of the whole class alone tomorrow for chorus midterms. awesome. i dont even know the fuckin song. i dont really care anymore.
i love my friends like woooooaaah yoo. they always cheer me up. shelley with football players/travis barker and j with hanson look alikes. bah theyre so amazing i love them. =]
travis barker is so the hottest man alive. besides my adam. oh baby. theyre like total opposites im retarded.
ljksdad im gettin daaa permit tomorrah finally and im gettin the nails done. woo<3
curtis came over today. and i was asleep so he woke me up my sticking his fingers in my ear wieuhyrwl;iru i hate that and he knows it. hahaha i love hiiim times 9329289347298740 =]
current mood: tired
current music: i can make a messsss like nobahdys business.
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Sunday, January 8th, 2006
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8:43 pm
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i fucking hate midterms and being stressed. i just wanna drop dead. ive been doing homework and midterm shit since 1. when i woke up. it is now 8:44 and i juust finished. ugh me and curtis got in a dumbass fight. were over it now but it was stupid and made me mad. i <3 him. fucking school tomorrow project to present in geometry. then idk what the fuck else. im going to shower
current mood:  pissed off
current music: nothing.
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